I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
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