we have pet lesbian snakes
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
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