but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Randomize
