She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize
