Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Cover your peen. We're going out.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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