well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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