Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
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