Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(303): View more from Colorado

My hand turned me down

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(973): View more from New Jersey

i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.

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(601): View more from Mississippi

She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.

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(720): View more from Colorado

There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"

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(330): View more from Ohio

It's just like the Real World with babies

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(806): View more from Texas

You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."

(1-806): View more from Texas

Best pick-up line ever!

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi

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(206): View more from Washington

It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.

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(719): View more from Colorado

If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.

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