After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
