I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Randomize
