Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
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