Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(734): View more from Michigan

Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"

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(740): View more from Ohio

I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD

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(907): View more from Alaska

Tell me the dirtiest joke you know

(1-907): View more from Alaska

Sarah Palin

(907): View more from Alaska

god, I love you

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(757): View more from Virginia

Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.

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(563): View more from Iowa

At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups

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(715): View more from Wisconsin

I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.

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(419): View more from Ohio

I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex

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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?

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