youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
