If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
be right there i have to get my cape
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize