found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Randomize
