I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Randomize
