just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
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