I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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