And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
Randomize