You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
my being single is dangerous.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Randomize
