I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Randomize
