Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize
