Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
it's not cheating when I paid for it
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Randomize