Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
