So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
I wish you could order shots online.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
