I'm jealous of your bromance
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Randomize
