All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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