I just made out with a guy for $7.
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize
