Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
