I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
