I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize