From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Randomize
