I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
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