Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Dicks are not precious.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Randomize
