So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize
