So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Randomize