i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
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