Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Randomize