So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
