So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Success! We fucked roommates!
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
