gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Dick very happy bro
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Randomize