i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
