Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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