i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
Randomize
