Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(740): View more from Ohio

she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside

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(458): View more from Oregon

Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard

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(580): View more from Oklahoma

Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out

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(339): View more from Massachusetts

You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.

(781): View more from Massachusetts

I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.

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(904): View more from Florida

That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.

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(312): View more from Illinois

You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..

(1-312): View more from Illinois

Don't judge me.

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(516): View more from New York

ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work

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