and next time when you feel me up, do it right
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
