Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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