The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
