the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
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