Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Randomize