I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
Randomize
