Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
oh god the rape fog is back!
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
and you fell through a lawn chair
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Randomize